John Mayer & Jesus in the Same Post

"You ever have that thought that bums you out--you have a thought that bums you out and you're bummed out by the thought, but the thought escapes you, so all you're left with is being bummed out, but you can't remember what it was that bummed you out in the first place so you spend time going back in your mind trying to figure out why you're not looking forward to Tuesday, whatever Tuesday is--you're like, 'What's wrong with Tuesday? Hasn't even happened yet and I'm freaked out about it.' Well, this is a song about going back in your head and making a list and checking it twice and--that was a holiday reference during the summer. Let's hear it for me!"- J.Mayer

Long, but fitting. A summer storm eclipsed the sky this evening, flashes of lightning struck the surrounding air, rain fell at varying intensities & something changed in me. I'm usually uplifted by the darkening of the sky, but tonight was different. Tonight, I became aloof; I became withdrawn. I'm not depressed, but an air of sadness has fallen over me.

In the past three weeks, normalcy and routine have been completely eradicated from my life as I have returned home from school & regrettably settled into the swing of summer. Supposedly, I have been resting, & yet, I'm still tired. Apparently, I've needed these listless days to recharge, but I have become restless. You'd think I'd know the shape of home by now, but I need to relearn how to fit under this roof...Because of the slight adjustment in every day life that I'm begrudgingly accepting, I will admit that I have forgotten about the one constant in life. Christ.

As I look back at the last 21 days, I see lack of time spent in His presence, & I am without excuse. I am always without excuse & always learning the value in consuming myself with Him, daily. I need Him to rid me of the things innate within me. I am a lazy summer without Him. I am without direction & without motivation without Him... I barely exist.

I think I found the thought that has bummed me out, & so I will go to Him, craving His spirit. Always. Thank You for the promise of life, Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live!

















(P.C.: Weheartit)

Good thing I recognize this building to be at the corner of Wacker Dr. & N. Michigan Ave. in Downtown Chicago. I'm in love...

Edit:// It doesn't help that Ryan Trevino (Boyfriend Extraordinaire) will be in my favorite place for a couple of days. Lucky.

Conclusions

My first year of college is almost over...Weird! This year has been filled with wonder, heartbreak, happiness, & an endless supply of joy. Things have been graciously taken away while others have been graciously given, & I think I've begun to touch the iceberg of accepting brokenness & transparency, both in myself & others. Change has surrounded me, newness has penetrated my soul, & yet Love has conquered my dislike for both of those things. I'm eternally grateful for a God who has afforded me another day to bask in His mercy, & I pray...

He will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure. Isaiah 33:6

This past year, I have only been trying to act justly, love mercy, & walk humbly with my God, & I firmly believe He has manifested Himself in my life in countless ways despite the times I have failed. I have been challenged, I have grown, & I have learned about His character. He has been Giver, Lover, Friend; Secret Keeper, Provider, Pasture Maker. He has been my Foothold that's familiar. He is the Beginning and the End. So, as I press on with my school work, dreaming about the summer days, I'm reminded that He has also been faithful in answering questions and fears that have crept into me about what my summer will hold. Now, I just can't wait for it to start...













(P.C.: Google Images)
Here's to the tousled hair, no makeup, sitting by the pool (with an obliging boyfriend), carefree days of summer! (As I write this, I'm wondering how many of these days will actually happen.)

Bless & be blessed.

Bizzzzy Beee

I find that when I'm stressed I make lists. Lists & lists & lists. Today, I made four lists. I'm not stressed, but I'm trying to ward off any remnant of those feelings that might have the courage to sneak up on me this week. Here's to the busy week ahead...
















(P.C.: Weheartit)
I'm excited!

Silence

Sometimes, I feel like I'm getting lost in the white noise of this "blogosphere," & as a result, I am discouraged from writing. But, since I am here writing, these words are mine. Neither wrong nor right. As I "say" that, I also know that I haven't been motivated to write. I feel like I haven't had much to say, & honestly, I've had a hard time cracking open my journal to write to the Author of Life. The one who created the idea of pen to paper.

What pains me is that so much of life has happened in the last few weeks. I have been learning, learning, learning. Growing, growing, & growing. I have been living in Him, & I have been fully alive in His promises. But I've been thinking...maybe it's okay to let "life" resonate inside before I can explain it. Maybe it's okay to need quiet & to be silent.

All the while, I have learned that not acknowledging the thriving freedom found in Jesus Christ is cancerous to my soul. Savoring transparency, curiosity, & gratitude are necessary & fruitful. And love just might be the nucleus of all joy.

I hope this early early early Tuesday morning finds you filled with wonder...












(P.C.: Google Images)
Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor & glory for ever and ever. Amen. First Timothy 1:17

Les Choristes

I would have to say that one of my all time favorite foreign films (I've only seen about four) is Les Choristes. Yes, it's in French. Yes, I hated it when I watched it in high school. But, it's so good. Summary: Clément Mathieu, a music professor, arrives at a boarding school for problematic boys, & changes the lives of the boys through music. It's really very touching...

I would like to watch it without subtitles one day.

Click here for the trailer. 

The Summer Months

When blueberries aren't $5 per carton...

I love baking this beauty. But, I bake the whole pie, of course.
Wild blueberry pie with almond crumble topping...
















I baked it last summer multiple times, and it just goes so well paired with a cool summer night. I cannot wait for summer. I'm not sure what summer holds for me, but I'm excited to see. I'm excited to wait. I'm excited to enjoy SPRING.

See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come...
Song of Solomon 2:11-12

Happy Wednesday : )

My Favorite Song

I like to claim this as my theme song for my life:

Well, I've never been a fashion queen
I wear dresses I wear jeans
I've even been known to wear my heart on my sleeve
I'm just your average kid next door
A plain, simple mystery
I'm a self-proclaimed daddy's girl
With my share of idiosyncrasies
But You love me for me

I'm just fine
I see a smile from Heaven
My Father's proud
And I know that I am simply, fearfully, and wonderfully
Made in You
You make it beautiful somehow

I've got old-fashioned sensibilities
I believe chivalry still exists
And I can be a princess
Even when there ain't no prince
So what if I'm right brained
I've got half a mind to disagree
I would rather write the book
Than go and read the movie
So even when I may not rhyme
You always give me reason

Every day, every way
Got my elbows on the table
My mind up in the clouds
I know I'm getting better
I can almost hear You laugh out loud
The more I trust in You
The more I find
What You create is no mistake
It's purpose by design

Beautiful somehow
That is what You do
Beautiful somehow
Beautiful in You


I praise you because I am fearfully & wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:14

Yes. Yes. And Yes.