sunday afternoon

things that have changed in the last two years: i've graduated from college, managed to convince some people i'm a real adult, and purchased a (real-adult) couch.

things that haven't changed in the last two years: i still fall asleep in movies, clean incessantly, and cherish the first sip of coffee above most things. 

and now that all five people who read this are caught up...

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i sit at my kitchen table, pen in hand, coffee in close proximity, journal open to a fresh page- the blank lines promising revelations and musings, promising to hold my smeared stories, smeared with tears, as i recount the moments i don’t want to lose. i begin writing with less of a purpose in mind and more of the sheer need to feel ink on paper, my hand etching its way across my own sort of wilderness. 

today i write about his love. HIS love. i try to explain it with words, descriptors that might minimally grasp this reality in my life. but, i've often found that words cannot envelop the wonder that is his love. they fall short. they're insufficient. and yet, i still try, because i appreciate how the combination of letters in a certain order can evoke such feeling and truth. writing is like a puzzle. how can i bind specific parts of this puzzle to communicate what i think, feel, and know? i know his love; i've experienced it beyond what i deserve, but words confine it. they hinder and limit its magnitude.

even still, his love is fierce and gentle, bold and sweet; it is unconquerable, unwavering, untiring; it is stubborn and persistent, always welcoming. it sustains me through the night and satisfies me every morning. his love penetrates every darkened crevice and overcomes my weaknesses. it is gracious and merciful beyond my comprehension. his love is selfless, sacrificial, and so undeserved. its foolishness has saved me.

so now, the pages of my journal are tear-stained. i've sat in his presence, in awe of who he is, and he is good.

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because of his love, i'm learning to live open-handedly. empowered by his love, i'm learning to live generously. i must confess that it's still hard for me to live this way. naturally, i want to keep these struggles to myself.

bear with me.

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oh, the glory of the savior's love

surrounding our surrender

to know forever we are welcomed home

thursday's words

My advice for today is as follows--

1. Skip class at least once a semester.
2. Find a running buddy. And run.
3. Drink water, and drink lots of it.
4. Comparison is a thief. Help yourself and those around you kill it. 
5. Fall in love with a British boy band.

And those are my words.

thursday's words

I've got some advice. 
Consider it free--

1. Always be sure that your dishwasher is empty when having friends over for dinner.
2. Find a good chocolate chip cookie recipe. And memorize it.
3. Floss your teeth before you brush them.
4. Write papers at least three days before they're due.
5. Confess and forgive. Your body will thank you.

xoxo

sufficient

You wouldn't believe how many times I've begun to type something in this little text box and pressed backspace. Words are insufficient; words fall short. It's as if there's a disconnect between my head and my heart, a disturbing nuisance making fuzzy the connections that I so often rely on as I'm not adept with the spoken word. I want to write! I want to write about the joys that invade my life and the fears that are sometimes quick to choke them. I want to share my struggles, the things which threaten to suffocate me, and I want to share my victories, the things which are meant to be celebrated. Oh, how I want to write with reckless abandon...

But not tonight. Words elude me, and I'm left with a single phrase that's been reverberating off the walls of my heart: I am His, and He is mine.

And right now, that is sufficient.

Picture Cred: Here

Thy mercy, my God

We've been singing this at church lately, and I do love it.//

Thy mercy, my God, is the theme of my song,

The joy of my heart. and the boast of my tongue;

Thy free grace alone, from the first to the last,

Hath won my affections, and bound my soul fast.

Without Thy sweet mercy I could not live here;
Sin would reduce me to utter despair;
But, through Thy free goodness, my spirits revive,
And He that first made me still keeps me alive.

Thy mercy is more than a match for my heart,
Which wonders to feel its own hardness depart;
Dissolved by Thy goodness, I fall to the ground,
And weep to the praise of the mercy I’ve found.

Great Father of mercies, Thy goodness I own,
And the covenant love of Thy crucified Son;
All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine
Seals mercy, and pardon, and righteousness mine.
All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine
Seals mercy, and pardon, and righteousness mine.

Thursday Morning Listening

Ben Rector // I Wanna Dance With Somebody from capture studios on Vimeo.

You'll love it. I swears.

Wanna Laugh?

Watch this video.

It's the Newby-Daniels-Faber comedy team.
Enjoy!